Silent House

So I know that the whole "shot in one take" thing is not true, so I wasn't too distracted with figuring out how they did it; I was, however, distracted by how much Elizabeth Olsen looks like her sisters. Aside from that, I watched this movie with the hopes that it would be at least somewhat spooky. I have not seen a movie that actually scared me in so long, I'm willing to settle for being a little spooked. And don't get me wrong, there were a couple of creepy parts, and the fact that it's just one girl wandering around a house that is inhabited by a bad guy who's trying to kill her father gives a sense of isolation and terror that you can identify with, and makes it watchable enough as you wait for something to happen.That's how they get you, building up the suspense while you wait for it to get to the good part.

But as much fun as it is trying to figure out what the heck is going on, in the end I felt the same way I feel about so many of the movies I watch these days... disappointed. I can't say much without spoiling it, but I really feel like Hollywood could do better if they wanted to. Laziness is running rampant in the genre, where the same ending is trotted out over and over again, in the hopes that you've never seen a horror (or any other kind of) movie before. There is so much more that could be done with these types of movies, but they take the easy way out.

Am I recommending this one? I would say it's just OK, one time through. Like I said, it builds suspense and keeps you wondering what's going on until the end, but the payoff is not that exciting.So, watch it if you're looking for a somewhat tense, slightly spooky movie about a girl alone in a big house, but don't expect too much from the ending. Unless you've never seen any other scary movie.

Tucker & Dale Vs. Evil

I'll just come right out and say it... this movie was awesome. I didn't know what this was about at all, but after the first few minutes I was hooked. It's more of a comedy than a horror movie, technically, but it takes all the cliches of horror movies and spins them into an original, funny, violent, ridiculously fun film. The obligatory, attractive college-aged kids head to a remote cabin for some time away from mid-terms and teachers, and of course they run into Tucker and Dale at the convenience store. In these movies there's always some creepy guy at the town store who warns them of the dangers ahead or just stares at them while chewing and spitting tobacco, so as to give the kids the willies; however these guys are just socially awkward, not homicidal. They may be hicks, but they certainly aren't psychotic killers or The Hills Have Eyes-esque mutants. So when the guys rescue one of the kids, her friends jump to the conclusion that they've kidnapped her and are going to start murdering all of them. So they strike first, trying to take the "killers" down before they get them. What follows is ridiculous and would never happen, but it is entertaining. I won't say much more, but just trust me... this movie is awesome.

House on Haunted Hill (1999)

This movie scared me to death when I was younger. I still don't like watching it alone. So creepy. It is based on the old Vincent Price movie, and in fact the production company that made this, Dark Castle, was formed just to remake the old Price horror films (13 Ghosts is my other favorite... review to follow a bit later). A bunch of people get invited to a big, ominous-looking mansion for the birthday party of a rich guy's wife, but the rich guy and his wife both claim they never invited these people. Hmmm... If you don't know what happens next you've obviously never seen this movie and should run out and rent it immediately. You're missing out. Taye Diggs (who should be in more horror movies and less sappy medical dramas on TV) and Ali Larter are two of the guests who end up trapped inside the mansion, which of course was also a mental institution run by a scary doctor at one time. And of course it's haunted. There are so many disturbing images and freaky noises in this haunted house you'll be covering your eyes by the time it's over. Lisa Loeb (the singer) and James Marsters (Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer) pop up at the very beginning, and if Geoffry Rush channeling Vincent Price doesn't do it for you, you're much too tough a crowd.. This is one of my all time favorites and I recommend it for the horror fan who likes a bit of polish and a nod to the old days.

The Chernobyl Diaries

So a group of friends decide to take a tour of the city that was home to the workers of Chernobyl. They think it'll be cool to see the abandoned city, and their tour guide (who seems just a tiny bit shady) assures them that it's perfectly fine and safe to go to the city. They get to their destination after the obligatory opening scenes of the friends and the other couple who are also taking the tour, bonding and having a great time.

All is fine until it gets dark, and then all of the tour guide's assurances suddenly mean squat. There are wild animals-and something else?-running around at night, and once they meet up with them, it goes downhill from there... but in a good way. But really, what did they think would happen? I personally wouldn't go somewhere after I've been told "we won't be there long enough to be affected by the radiation." Yikes.

I felt like the buildup was good (I wasn't bored), and there were some jumpy moments. It was also educational; I learned that you should never go inside a nuclear reactor. I thought the ending was a little disappointing, but I wasn't completely pissed off (like at the end of Wicker Man or The Number 23 - yes, I'm still bitter about that). All in all, a fun ride.

Cabin in the Woods

I loved this movie. Pardon me while I gush for a moment. I can't say much without giving everything away, so I will just hit the high points and be as vague as possible.

It stars Chris Hemsworth and Bradley Whitford (one of the high points I mentioned), and is about 5 young friends who go to the cabin of Hemsworth's cousin to have a fun weekend. And then things get weird. I can't say any more. All I will say is that it is not what you expect and you need to see it before you hear too much about it. It's the best movie I've seen in a while, horror or otherwise. At least, I enjoyed it more than pretty much anything I've seen lately. It's funny and scary and gory, and it has an original premise, which is hard to come by these days. Go see it! Just trust me.

Absentia

This one is good. That was what I thought when I had made it about 20 minutes in. I didn't know what it was about when I first started watching it (thank goodness for IMDB), but once I knew what was going on (at least the general plot), it got moving pretty fast. Tricia's husband disappeared without a trace seven years ago, and she is about to have him declared dead in absentia (hence the name), and she is also pregnant with the child of the detective who has been looking for her husband all these years. Her sister Callie comes to stay with her; Callie goes jogging every day, and every time she goes through the tunnel down the street you wait for something to jump out and get her. Great atmosphere in this one, very creepy and just enough things popping out or appearing out of nowhere to keep your guard up.

Callie meets a man in the tunnel who it turns out has also been missing for a long time, and she begins to suspect something is going on. Animals are disappearing from the neighborhood and there have been several break-ins. Then, just after Tricia signs the papers to have him declared dead, her husband shows up. He just comes walking up to the house, looking like hell. Obviously wherever he's been there was no sunshine. Maybe he was lost in Seattle.

I can't tell you much else without giving too much away, except that I would have liked a happier ending (I know, it's a horror movie and I know better). It's low-budget but well done, and better than a lot of movies like this that I've seen. I highly recommend this one.

Dream House

Oh, where to begin... Well, let me just start by warning you: Barbie is not in this movie. (Sorry, I hear dream house, I think Barbie). But seriously, I have to actually warn you, there may be spoilers ahead. I'll try to be as vague as possible but no promises.

This sounded like it might be ok; I like Rachel Weisz and she is usually pretty good. I'm just not sure why she's in this movie. I guess it was the price she had to pay to meet her future husband. So, anyway, this happy family moves into their dream home and they're all very happy until a guy starts lurking outside the windows and scaring the little girls. Then after some more strange happenings Daniel Craig (of the soulful blue eyes) does some digging and wow, when the twist hit I literally said, Really?! And it's downhill from there. There's not much I can say without ruining it, but let's just take a moment to reflect on the horror movie twist. The idea is to shock you and a lot of times the twist is your main reason for seeing the movie (that's how I got suckered into seeing The Happening), but a whole movie that has everything riding on the twist is a bad idea. If it's not well done it's just sad and distracting. And that is this movie. It not only takes a bizarre turn about halfway through, it then gets sad and creepy, and then twists again. I gave up after that.

I thought it was a haunted house movie, but it's really more of a psychological thriller/drama and if you like that sort of thing you might like this. However, if you aren't easily amused you will probably be as irritated as I was. I just kept thinking, I want to write a letter. Just not sure who to send it to. Again, rent only if you can suspend your disbelief a lot longer than I obviously can.